Imagine if you will that our world had, once upon a time, been threatened by a force of pure destructive evil straight out of a science fiction horror movie. For purposes of illustration, let’s say that Earth was invaded by the xenomorph monsters from the “Alien” series. Let’s imagine that said monsters went on a rampage that killed millions of people both on the battlefield and off, and that the war to bring their invasion to a halt was a major turning point in world history whose repercussions are still being felt over seventy years later. Everyone in the world knows how awful these things are, everyone knows the horror they wrought, and everyone can pretty much recognize them on sight–we’re not talking about skin-suit wearing V or human-impersonating Terminator cyborgs, we’re talking about things that don’t and can’t hide what they are.
Now let’s imagine that with that worldwide mindset, a couple hundred of these xenomorphs’ slimy eggs suddenly appeared in the middle of, say, Virginia. Not doing anything, not looking even ready to hatch for the most part. One adult alien monster gets out and eats somebody, and gets pretty quickly taken down. Do we think that these ~300 defenseless eggs, even if they were to start vomiting up facehuggers and maturing into full-grown monsters, would have any chance whatsoever of spreading out to the point where they’re a threat again? Or would people keep a wary eye on them but be ready to blast them to oblivion as soon as it they started to actually hurt people? The answer of course is no, this handful of very-easily-recognizable monsters wouldn’t be a threat to humanity as we know it even if all of a sudden they decided to go berserk. No one’s going to mistake them for Starman or E.T. and think they’re just here to phone home.
That, in essence, is what the knuckleheaded “Nazi” LARPers are. Everyone in the entire goddamned world knows what a Nazi is, they know a swastika and they know a real racist when they hear them. Seriously, if you wanted to start an actual subversive movement, the dumbest thing you could do would be to start dressing like a skinhead and using the swastika as your insignia, because every second grader around the world knows that means you’re a bad guy. That’s not exactly going to help your recruitment prospects. Everyone in the world will be watching your ignorant, backwards backside closely and making sure you don’t step one inch out of line, and terminating you with extreme prejudice the instant you do.
If you want positive proof that LARPing “Nazis” aren’t a threat, just look at the stand-down order given in Charlottesville. The white nationalists had a permit to have their little rally, Antifa didn’t, and the police were told not to interfere with whatever happened despite the nationalists having dotted their i’s and crossed their t’s. They didn’t do this because they were afraid to confront the LARPing knuckleheads, they did it so Antifa could go in and punch them. Is that getting through to you? The police’s leftist overlords considered the “Nazis” to be so insignificant of a threat that they backed away to let a crowd of masked betas through to have at them with impunity. It was only after one of the “Nazis” retaliated by driving his car into the counterprotesters that the flaw in this plan became clear. Of course, calling that incident a “flaw in the plan” assumes that drawing this foul was not something the left has been hoping for for years. Meanwhile the rest of the eggs just marinate in slime and acid, minding their own disgusting business but still hurting nothing.
You see folks, World War II happened not because Adolf Hitler wrote a book or a bunch of people in Germany decided they didn’t like Jews. That was merely the ideological driving force behind one of many conquerors who tried to bring all of Europe under his dominion. It was repugnant and hateful, sure, but there are plenty of repugnant and hateful ideologies at work in the world today just as there have been throughout history. You want a great example, look at Islam. Contrary to popular leftist belief, we don’t go wantonly attacking every country that is full of Muslims even though their ideology calls for the destruction of all infidels. We go after the ones who have actually taken action to hurt or destroy us. In the same vein, World War II happened because of the actions taken by Hitler and the Germans and their Japanese allies, not because of the motivation behind them. Hell, most of the world didn’t know or didn’t believe what was going on behind German lines, and the big ideology we all decided to fight against was “Britain and the USA don’t want to be conquered by Germany and Japan.” We actually knew more going in about Japanese atrocities against the Chinese than we did about what the Nazis were doing. We knew the Nazi state was a dictatorship, sure, and we were pretty sure we wanted no part of that, but we didn’t find out just how bad they were until after the war.
The point is, the ideology doesn’t mean a damned thing in terms of how dangerous a group of people is, and really, in the case of LARPing “Nazis” taking their name and their symbology is so counterproductively stupid as to be laughable. Nobody is ever going to look at a Nazi and see a champion of justice and goodness any more than you’d look at an Alien xenomorph and see My Little Pony. But they sound so scary and are so reviled by literally everyone that they make an almost perfect straw man. This is why Godwin’s Law exists. Nazis are stupid, ignorant, petty and overall just absolutely unlikable, without a redeeming quality that comes to mind (just like Communists), but without having a massive government engine and military complex behind them they’re as harmless as the Heaven’s Gate cult. Any sinister ideas or plans they might have or attempt to put in motion are counterbalanced by the fact that, as known bad actors, every eye in the world is on them. It’s not dangerous to be stupid in small groups. Well, not as dangerous as in large groups anyway.
In his classic series “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy,” Douglas Adams created a planet populated by a race of wonderful, sweet, wholesome people who one day managed to figure out a way to travel into space. They found that the universe was full of stars and planets and other life forms and talked it over amongst themselves and cheerfully decided that, as Adams put it, “it would all have to go.” In the Hitchhiker universe, this planet full of nice, decent people then proceeded to cheerfully begin the eradication of all other life in the universe and were only stopped by their world being sealed away in another dimension. I know this example is as farcical as it is fictional but it helps drive home the point that without the means to act, ideology means nothing, and with the means to act, ideology still means very little. Nazis will never have the means to act again, not without being crushed in their infancy by simple operation of the laws of society, but they certainly make a terrifying bogeyman. I am not saying that an evil force and a repugnant ideology will never again rise to power in the world, far from it. I AM saying that any ideology stupid enough to use the swastika as its insignia will never rise again, and at best will only provide a smokescreen for the rise of something truly hideous. As Winston Churchill foretold, the fascists of the future will come under the banner of anti-fascists, and that future has arrived.
And while I hate to use an image for Antifa that is both competent and kind of cool, if we’re thinking of Nazis as Aliens, Antifa are the Predator. They are not heroic, they are not even brave, they’re just causing harm and destruction because to them it’s fun to pick on people who don’t have a prayer of fighting back…until one of them does fight back of course. Remember the tagline from the Aliens Versus Predator movies: whoever wins, we lose.