Neutrality is for Switzerland

I’ll start off by saying I hope that much of what I said in my last post turns out to be pessimistic and hyperbolic.  Such things happen.  But I’m going to leave it posted as it is.

But leave it to the left and their crack brigade of wailing snowflakes to show me that even at my doomsaying worst I’m still a beacon of sanity compared to these people.  The Federal Communications Commission is supposed to be ready to repeal the so-called “Net Neutrality” policy and the twits are out insisting that the internet as we know it is about to be totally destroyed.  Hysterical predictions of things like “Google is going to charge $1.99 per search” are only the beginning (news flash: the internet and Google existed for nearly twenty years before Net Neutrality and nobody ever paid a penny for a Google search).  Tears flow like rivers over the prospect that some people could pay for an internet “fast lane” while others are consigned to the “public slow lane.”  Um…good?  If you want the fast lane to exist AT ALL then there has to be an incentive for someone to invent, develop, and market it, and if they have to let every schmo use it for free there’s no reason to spend time and resources making it better.  This is akin to insisting that you should be able to walk onto a commuter flight for the same rate as you’d board a city bus.

Of course the hysterics aren’t limited to concerns that might–just might–have some remote foundation in reality.  I can almost understand people who really have no clue how a free market works being frightened by the idea that OMG you might have to pay for something if you want the very best service.  They’re wrong, you’re going to keep getting the same quality of stuff for free now that you always have, but these ninnies have been so conditioned to believe the “evil corporations” are out to get them that I can’t fault them for having some reservations.  However, some of the more amusing wailings are about issues and problems that really took some sick imaginations to come up with, and interestingly enough, ought to tell you everything you need to know about Net Neutrality if you’re still on the fence.  Noted bimbo, outspoken liar and apparently broke sex addict Sandra Fluke tweeted out about how removing Net Neutrality would make it harder to access information about abortions–um, first, I wish that were true, and second, if it were true, that would be a major reason to kill it.  A member of the Commission itself despaired that removal of Net Neutrality would be racist.  Yup.  Not making that up.  Apparently minorities use the internet and never did before Net Neutrality was a thing.  Also, something about Ferguson.  It’s really not worth repeating the stupidity.  So we’ve established that race hustlers and baby murderers are all in favor of Net Neutrality, and on top of that Chuck U. Schumer and the Democrats are all in for it.  That ought to tell you all you need to know.

Really, what Net Neutrality is about is whether you trust the government or the market to regulate the internet.  I can’t say I’m thrilled about some of the things that big internet corporations like Google and Facebook have been up to lately, censoring conservatives and so-called “hate speech,” but I most definitely trust the free market to work that out, and frankly I don’t trust the government to do it at all.  Net Neutrality is like the Fairness Doctrine, it’s meant to sound pretty and friendly and “we just want to play fair” but then the government gets to decide what’s fair and who can and cannot be throttled or broadcast, and that’s never a good thing.  More importantly, that violates the First Amendment.  It also has the unpleasant effect of stifling innovation and improvement as well as competition.  Nobody’s going to develop the next generation of fiber optics or wifi or whatever lubes up the intertubes if they’re not going to be allowed to make any money doing so, either by telling folks “if you want to triple your bandwidth that’s what the premium plan is for” or by telling them “hey, we’re a new company that will triple your internet speed AND cut your bill, wanna sign up?”

Most of the snowflakes out crying bitter tears into their red cup lattes love Net Neutrality because it combines their three misguided favorite things: the internet, free stuff, and socialism.  They cannot imagine a world without the first and consider it an entitlement.  They think anything worth having is worth getting for free.  And they love socialism because it’s all so fair and kind and shared and they really don’t have a clue that it has never, ever worked and never, ever will.  Down with the corporations or something, she tweeted on her iPhone in between sips of her Starbucks mochaccino.

I was ambivalent about Net Neutrality for a long time because with all the bluster and false advertising it was difficult to figure out which end was which.  But thanks to a reversion to general principles and the cries of the screaming infants it’s become clear, Net Neutrality was a stupid, socialistic fix for a system that was never broken and it’s only going to impede progress and exert government control over the internet.  It needs to go.  And I will be right here, posting and commenting and emailing and doing Google searches just like always, even after the internet burns to ashes in the aftermath.

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